Thursday, March 26, 2009

If Only. If.

Well, this post -if you want to know- is actually not the original version. I wrote similar topic yesterday night while taking a break from my study, and I think I need to admit that my mind was not really that clear -as I thought it was yesterday. Words jumbled up. Not to mention the sentences that suddenly sound too melancholic. Perhaps the effect of being alone at night.

Anyway, this was what I wrote. And this is quite true.
How a part of me wishes that, in the future I could also have what I have now.
And how another part of me wishes that now I could just have what I would have in the future.
And how in my past, the future would give me some idea about what I should have had.. that now, the other part of me would not wish that I could have again what I had in the past.
Past, present, future. If only we can shuffle time as we wish we could.

I know, it's not that this could happen. That's why, it's only 'if.' If only.

And in this crazy life, and through this crazy time
It's you, it's you
You make me sing
You're every line, you're every word
You're everything

- Everything, Michael Buble

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Dream Races

"We grow great by our dreams," written on an ordinary plastic bag of an ordinary shop -named Shuang Hor, or whatever it is which I believe none of us would have heard about- on an ordinary morning, read by someone who had ordinary plans for the day. Everything was just ordinary, so were the sentence in which the 6 words were placed together to form a meaning. Whether or not the meaning would become extraordinary, I found it to depend on the reader herself.

I read those words. And as soon I read it, I was becoming reminded again of the things I posted before, about dreams and my breakthrough. I soon realized that throughout these times, my dream has grown me, and it is going to grow me even more. It is never what you have already had, or what you have already seen that will grow you, but it is what you dream you would have, or what you would become that will grow you. Our dream will force us to search, learn, and look for things, for ways. And before we knew it, we have become bigger people inside. It is our dream that will enlarge our capacity to have even bigger dreams. And I was reminded that keep having an unanswered dream at some point of your life does not necessarily mean that you are stuck. Rather it means that you have more rooms and opportunities to progress, and to grow bigger before your dream is answered.

In speaking about this, there is this book, The Alchemist, which was suggested by my somehow-so-happy-we-meet-again friend, by Paulo Coelho. And what he said is really true, "It is the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting." Though it may not yet come to pass, but the possibility of having it, is what will keep us going.

And in fact, throughout our lives, we should not have such thing as 'dreams accomplished.' We need to keep on dreaming, because the dreams will keep us going. So I will take this stage of my life as one part of the dream races. Where one dream that I'm going to achieve will take me to another unanswered dreams to achieve. On and on and on. Greater and greater.

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're fast asleep
In dreams you lose your heartaches
Whatever you wish, you keep

Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come shining through
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
The dream that you wish will come true

- From Disney, Cinderella Theme Song

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Breakthrough Needed

Have you ever felt like you lose direction, where you look for a way but there are only closed doors everywhere. And you are banging at the doors and you shout, and you cry, hoping there is somebody outside there who can hear you and open the door for you, but between you and the door is a thick metal wall now, and no matter how loud you are shouting, it will just make you realize even more, that you are alone.

Now outside there are all your dreams, all your passions, all your desires, while you feel like you are trapped inside, and it is getting insane inside of you now that you just can't break through the walls and the doors and all your dreams just seem unreachable. Then what you need is a BREAKTHROUGH! One explosion, BAM! that can change your life forever more, turn it around, and you can start perspiring to build upon your dreams. Instead of being exhausted to just get out of the trap.

I am, in need of that explosion, the BREAKTHROUGH! Desperately.

"If there is no struggle, there is no progress. Those who profess to favor freedom and yet depreciate agitation...want crops without plowing up the ground, they want rain without thunder and lightning. They want the ocean without the awful roar of its many waters... Power concedes nothing without demand. It never did and it never will.

... Men may not get all they pay for in this world, but they pay for all they get."

- Frederick Douglass, 1857

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Life From Here

"What is this life if full of care; we have no time to stand and stare."
- W. H. Davis in Leisure

This, I found to be true especially recently. With all those piled-up things-to-do every single day and all those cares about whats-after-this and how-about-that and the cares to fulfill own needs or not any better, the demands of others on ourselves, we no longer have those free time to just stand still, take a breath, and look at our lives. Take a pause, observe it, reflect from it, learn from it.

And I realize that there's so much more to life when we have enough time to just appreciate it. Not always by making use of every single second effectively to pursue our dreams - which is important indeed, but also simply by
taking a break out of the heaviness in life, and counting the blessings.

Then I decided to start sharing my thoughts here. Hesitated to start a blog again after abandoning the old one, I feel like I need to share some of my thoughts and life lessons, simply because like a river, you can't contain more if you don't flow out more.

So be blessed, be strengthened, be inspired, be encouraged, be awakened, be reminded once again, as I'm sharing my life, from here.


Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
- Mahatma Gandhi