Ab. Father. Dad.

The word 'father,' in Hebrew is the word 'Ab.' It means 'the source; the one who strengthens the family.' That explains why a father is the one who marks the formation of a family. And it is undeniable, that without a father, there would never be you, and there would never be me, because a father is the source. Everything in the family should have come from him, and started by him.

* * *

To Dad.

Just now I had a chat with my friend. And at this moment if you could just know what is going on in my mind and my heart, or if you could ever for a reason read what I wrote here, I just want to say this. At those times when we hoped that there was somebody that would stand for us, would even be willing to lay down his life for us, when we hoped that there would be someone who could be our strong tower in the midst of great storm, the one we could depend on. Where were you when we needed you the most? Did we even have to 'hope' for something from you? After all, you are the father. Ab, as they may say in other language, the source-so as to say. But you chose to ignore anyway.

In your mind, you might think that when we asked you for help, it was because we could do nothing without you. Then you might think that our lives will no longer be complete without you being here in the midst of us. You might think that our lives will be ruined and we do not have any directions in life the day you left home. That we would be lonely when you went away. Actually, even if that was the case, what's the problem with us thinking that we could do nothing without you? After all, you are the father. Ab, as they may say in other language, the source-so as to say. But you chose to leave anyway.

And now if I have to say, perhaps you are wrong. We are still alive, we live happily, healthily.

But if I ever had the chance to say what I have to say honestly, I just want you to know what I really felt deep inside. You might think that we could never be what we're supposed to be without you. We might say that you are wrong. That we could just live as if we'd never had you in our lives. That without you we could still be normal. But ironically, I hate to say that you are right. The fact is, things will never be what they were supposed to be without you here. Because as they say, a father is the source. And you should be the one who makes our family a family. You have started it and you can't leave it, can you? And when we could go through it all for all these times, it was not because we could do it without you. We just need to go on. And we need to live on. So if you would want to ever come back home, please come back home.

Where'd you go
I miss you so
Seems like it's been forever
That you've been gone
Please come back home
- Where'd You Go, Fort Minor